So you want to FREQUENTLY ASK QUESTIONS

Who is responsible for these words of wisdom?

The indispensable advice offered by Balloon Goes Bang is carefully crafted by a highly trained team of careers advisers, motivational experts, and life coaches. Or it's typed in a tear-stained fury by a bitter underemployed loser who decided his neighbors shouldn't be the only ones to hear his self-pitying howls of impotent rage. You decide.

Can I write for Balloon Goes Bang?

Sure, just email us here.

Where do you get your ideas?

From the wind, the trees, sunshine, spring flowers, gentle rain, minor disappointment, our own gnawing sense of failure, cheap gin, ketamine.

I really do want to be an astronaut/F1 driver/flower arranger/whatever and I'm deeply wounded by your nasty words. Where do I complain?

You can either write a comment and watch with pride as it is quietly deleted, or send an email marked "I enjoy making pointless complaints" here.

Please note: BALLOON GOES BANG INC is a fully incorporated entity registered and licensed in the Turks and Caicos Islands. We reserve the right to ignore, publish, and hold up for public ridicule any and all email received, and to shamelessly rip off any and all ideas contained therein without credit, payment, or permission. All rights reserved.